The biggest thing to note is that although we are still dealing with the loss of my Grandad, our family is staying strong and moving on just as he would have expected. We can't believe just how much stuff he had and how much he "dealt" with. So many accounts, papers, and business things that we have lost track. And he seemed like such a simple man. Apparently, there's nothing simple about death and we are finding that out the hard way. More specifically, my mom and my aunt who are handling all this are finding this out! The good news is that we are learning to survive without him and realize that life does go on. Slowly; but it does.
I have a new atmosphere at home the past couple of weeks. Alex began preschool so I am left with just one child during a 7 hour block of the day. I knew I'd miss her but must confess looking forward to the change of pace and a little more freedom. I'm not sure why but those of you who are parents know how much of a difference just one child can make, especially outside of the home. Running errands seems much easier and doing simple things at home. I was a little worried that Ashlyn might be more clingy without someone to play with but I have been pleasantly surprised. She is much more independant here by herself and is learning to play with more imagination. She and I now have more one on one time and to anyone that's seen us together, you may think that's the last thing she needs. However, she seems to be letting go a little easier since I have more time to focus on her during the day. I have been very surprised and am happy with how she's adjusting to this change. Alex loves school but doesn't understand why she can't sleep late and then go. She's only getting up about 30 minutes earlier than usual but she, like most of us, would rather wake up on her own. Still, she's enjoying the bus rides, meals at school and friends to play with. Anyone that knows Alex knows that she's been wanting to go to school for quite a while so it seems as though there was no adjustment period at all for her since she was sooooo ready! With school comes the dreaded "attitude". We've already experienced hands on the hips, the eyeroll and occasional huffing and puffing. Not that she didn't ever do this before; its just become a normal part of her normal conversation now that we are trying to eliminate. Other that these minor things, preschool has been an awesome thing for us.
Austin is doing mostly well. All A's except for math which he has really been struggling with. Mostly multiplication, word problems and compound problems. If anyone has any suggestions, please share! Baseball will be starting again soon and he's excited about that and looking forward to seeing his friends outside of school. He also has a birthday coming up and he'll be in double digits this year -10. Can you believe that because I can't. He's a great 10 year old and I hope to still be saying that about him even after we enter the teenage years. Pray for us.
And now for my hubbie. He finished his EMT class in December and took his state test in January which he passed of course. So now, he has one more certification under his belt and hopefully, things will slow down a little for him. We support what he's doing but selfishly, we miss him at home. Maybe now we can see him a little more often.
Last, an update on me. As you may know, being a mom and wife, your life is usually spelled out by your children and husband's lives. I'm no exception. If you'd like to know what's new with me, just read about the rest of my family. Some days that's very rewarding and some days I wonder just where that girl from high schoolwith all those big dreams went. I know that this will all pay off in the end and that I am rewarded by simply seeing my children flourish. They are a gift from God and I'm sure that they are my ultimate purpose. Still, I am human and have selfish wants that I may even get to fullfill one day. In the meantime, I will accept my role and continue on, hoping that I always do the best I can at this job I have been given. After all, its a lot tougher than I thought it would be!